Struggling TodayI

I wish for one moment of the day I didn't care how much I weigh or exactly how many calories each morsel of food has in it.  I am barely eating today and I am guilty of taking laxatives last night to purge out all of the garbage I devoured yesterday.  I am paying for it today because of the nausea and chest pain I have been having.  I laid down and I took a 2 hour nap.  Some times it is so much easier to sleep the hunger pains away and then sometimes the chest pains go away too.  I am feeling a little bit worthless today.  Sad I didn't make it to an Easter Service somewhere.  Easter Sundays = an abundance of food = an abundance of people.  The two go hand in hand.  I know the true meaning of Easter, the celebration of Christ Rising!  He Lives!  I wish and I pray that I can let go, let go of the depression and EDO's before it is to late.  I seriously could go back to bed right this minute and sleep the day away and not get up until tomorrow...but I can't...my son and our canine girls they are counting on me.  Plus I have a hard working husband who will be home for supper who deserves something decent to eat.  Time to get of my pity pot and get busy.......Take care everyone.....PKS